Met Charlene yesterday at Macdonald for dinner and rush down for Zuan's grandma's Funeral. Spoke with Zuan's mum and mingle with her sisters. Its nice to see everyone accept it as grandma accept it too when she is still alive. She is a strong and optimistic grandma. Grandma I really salute with all my respect and might.

Heard a great news from Zuan, she is getting ROM in January. So happy for her, after all the tumbling and banging, she have finally found someone she love to spend her whole life with. It makes me wonder what we really look in life and what are we anticipating from it. Its always the "and then" that is always probing me. In life people come and go... and then... At a stage we have boyfriend... and then... Finally we are married... and then... Heard that she is holding a simple ROM reception. Realise that we are all maturing, already at the stage where people go and people create new life.

After the funeral session, Charlene came to my house to rush her Business Law assignment. So great of me to help her figure out the question and is driving both of us crazy. To be honest, Law is always not my style as i can't memorize my books. Got a D grade for my Business Law in Poly days. If you think that is distinction u are wrong. Its just a passing grade borderline grade. I'm just not talented to study.

I'm so excited today. Hubby ask me to meet up for gathering with his old colleagues. I never thought that I will be associated with these type of gathering as Hubby never wants to join the my gathering. I'm simply exhilarated. I told everyone on MSN. Sometimes its just a simple invitation but it can drive me to cloud nine. He is a facinating guy that can drive my emotion to extreme level. He is able to let me tear for no reasons, smile for no reasons, and anticipate things for no reasons. Its going to be our Half year mark soon but the feeling is so fresh like it just happen yesterday. Having him around is remarkable. People complaint of being attached but they like to be attached. Contracdicting species in deed. I'm not complaining, I love the sensational feelings that he gave me.

Its already end of the month. I'm getting edgy again. Why is it so repetition that I have to go through this every month? Sometimes I was thinking how come her BF don't mind about the situation now, or am i that petty and particular about it. New month come and a new month for me to count the days. I trust him I really do but the devil inside me to take advantage of me. Rekindle... This is what the devil always says. I'm going crazy trying to exorcise the devil out of me. Always trying to plan my days with friends to drive the devil away from me. I'm still not satisfy. Why? Am I that greedy and selfish? Don't to lose him, this is what I always afraid of. Why will I demand more. He have compromise on anything i request. Why am I still not happy and still begging and dreaming for more? Fighting on the thoughts have become my hobby recently. Maybe I'm really insane. Deep down inside me, maybe I do have a gene of a devil.